In general, people like to be around those who are like them. We even find this in hiring biases, where hiring managers choose people with similar appearances, beliefs, and ideas.
We believe these similarities mean they’re a match for our corporate culture. If we find enough people who are alike, our organizations will thrive.
Plus, as a bonus, it means people will get along.
What if we’re wrong? What if we’re hurting ourselves and our organizations by hiring those who are like us or trying to make people more like us?
You know where I’m going with this. The truth is that we are hurting our organizations by trying to find people who are too similar to us. Whether this be in the way they dress, their college education, or their culture.
People Are Different
Even though I’ve been married for almost 20 years, I still struggle with this in my marriage. Sometimes, I get frustrated with my wife because she’s different from me.
The way she comes to conclusions. The way she evaluates other people. The way she phrases things.
They’re all different from the way I would do things. And those differences can make me cringe.
You’ve probably experienced this, too, in your relationships. Your spouse doesn’t make the bed the same way you do, the way you raise your children makes it seem they’re from a different planet, or the way you budget conflicts with their budgeting methods.
It’s frustrating when people are different.
Until you take a step back…
The best way to get along with people is not to expect them to be like you
-Joyce Meyer
When I step back and look at how my wife does things or the reasoning behind them, I can see a clear and appropriate line of thinking. Her critical thinking differed from mine, but she still made sound decisions and took action.
If you’ve taken the time to step back, you can see this in your relationships and interactions as well. People make decisions and take actions based on the information they have. Their past life experiences will give them insights you don’t have.
Their decisions often lead to even better outcomes than if they had followed the course of action you desired. Their differing perspective brought about a new decision. Maybe the two of you could even come together and join forces. The combined decision-making process leads to an even better decision.
Can You Accept That People Are Different?
So…
Why do we try to change people to be more like us? Why do we want them to be clones of us?
When we build organizations around people who think, act, and speak like we do, we create an organization that will struggle as we grow. You can’t grow when you have too many similarities.
The more diverse your organization is, the more ready and able your organization is to take on the changing landscape of business today.
The diversity of your people will be your strength. You’ll discover that Bob can tackle the finances, whereas you would struggle to balance the books. Sara can program like no other. You look at what she’s doing and wonder what all the squiggly lines on the screen are doing. You step in and speak in front of the entire organization. Others cower because they fear getting in front of people, but you relish speaking to large crowds.
We need to begin to accept the differences people bring to our organizations. Their differences are their strengths. They will complement your weakness. Your strengths will complement your weaknesses.
Let’s begin accepting others are different and enjoy what they can bring to our organizations.
