I am a God who heals. I heal broken bodies, broken minds, broken hearts, broken lives, and broken relationships. My very Presence has immense healing powers.
Jesus Calling, August 20
“With men it is impossible, but not with God; for with God all things are possible.” Mark 10:27, NKJV
When Jesus said that all things are possible with God, did He include fixing those broken, somewhat cracked, even estranged relationships we sometimes experience?
When we suffer the sadness of a broken relationship, we may grieve it for years. We may even wonder if it is really possible to mend it, or if we should just cut our losses and move on.
With God, all things are still possible!
One reason we can say with confidence that all things are possible with God is that God has not changed. He has not moved away. In fact, He knows the pain and frustration of broken relationships because His own children walked off without Him. Despite being treated as though He doesn’t exist, He opens the door and lets us back in. To this day, He renews relationships with anyone who wants to be near Him.
Of course, mending a bruised relationship takes two people who really want healing to happen. God doesn’t give up on us because He exists as unconditional love. He wants us to be part of His family. Even if He’s the only one making the effort, He keeps trying.
Do We Really Want to Mend Things?
In our case, we may not be quite that willing, to pursue those who have offended us, caused us pain, or simply made us miserable. We might feel better about simply letting go of the situation and not looking back.
The question of whether you can mend a fractured relationship has one answer: yes, with God’s help, it’s possible! If you really want things to change, He’ll start with you, softening your heart so you can step aside from emotional issues and focus on His direction. He will either help you fix things or allow you to move on with a peaceful spirit. In either case, you’ve opened the door to a new possibility, one that won’t leave you feeling stuck or angry, but instead, feeling God’s grace and peace.
It Takes Two to Mend a Relationship
In Robert Frost’s poem called Mending Wall, he describes the way he and a neighbor repair the wall that has broken down during the winter. Each spring, he and his neighbor, each staying on their respective sides of the fence, walk the length of the wall, chatting, looking for the holes in the fence, and one by one picking up stones to fill in the gaps. They each mend their own side, but they agree that it takes the two of them to get the job done. They complete the work and respond that “good fences make good neighbors.”
For any relationship to mend, both sides have to own their part of the brokenness and seek ways to mend the gaps in their thinking, their styles, and their perspective. Each one has to bring something to the rebuilding, with a desire to fix things before they are broken down even further.
Forgiveness Is a Key to Possibility
Mending a relationship may require you to surrender the hurt and frustration and the need to be right. It means prayerfully asking God for a soft and forgiving heart. It means a willingness to forgive the offender seventy times seven and then some. It may also mean setting boundaries so you can move on, knowing you’ve done all you can.
Some relationships are created for a given time but are not necessarily meant to be sustained for a lifetime. Others drive us to seek God’s grace and mercy to heal and to shine a light on renewed possibility. Either way, God will revive your spirit and heal your pain. You will be free to breathe in His direction for your life once more.
What Can You Do to Help Mend a Relationship Today?
Spend time in prayer
Own your part of the issues in the relationship
Be willing to listen to the other person with an open mind and heart
Reach out in love, even if you’re rejected
Remind yourself that it may be okay for the relationship to end
Be honest about whether you really want to mend the relationship
Listen for God’s help and direction
Define What It Means to Mend the Relationship
Repairing, mending, reviving, renewing any relationship is hard work. It takes the efforts of two people intimately involved, and equally desiring that the relationship continues. Often, it means that God must help because people are not always equipped to do the work needed. In any case, possibilities can be created when love abounds and when forgiveness prevails. Give each of your relationships to God, for He alone can make all things possible within them.